What if blame games is a big issue?

– We are all one, they say.
– I don’t agree.
– You are an idiot, leave!
– But you just said we are all one.
– You are ignorant, I don’t want your negative energy.

Sometimes it feels like that when entering the field of new agers. I meet people with great visions, who, at the same time, seems to be judgmental towards other. It’s as if their vision is so clear, so evident, so truthful, that voices that says otherwise are dismissed, in one way or another.

Something it's itching in me. A feeling of not being wanted, of not being allowed to be me, at the same time as they say: ”It’s you who create your life, if you don’t succeed, well, you didn’t really want it. You need to do more to manifest your dreams and vision.” 

(What would happen if that was said to a child in a favela in Rio de Janeiro?)

I notice, sometimes, a harsh blame game. An idea about something being an ideal, something almost divine and sometimes there is a wanting to be or to be regarded as enlightened. What I notice is an arrogance, and ”I am better than you, because I know the truth, the way, the answers”. And it turns me off. 

In a world that pretend to meet everyone where they are, who pretend to be open-minded (and maybe believe in it as well), I can see the narrowness in that vision. ”Be with us, think like us, don’t question us, don’t have an idea on your own… because then you are not welcome.”

I meet people who tell me they know how others should live, what is the solution to problems, and still, paradoxically enough haven’t done their own cleansing work. 

Sometimes the blame game makes me crumble and feel small, sometimes it makes me sad, and sometimes my anger is awakened: Who are the they who has all the answers, who knows how to live, who points at all sorts of wrong others seems to do? It’s like any authority is questioned, without really inviting an alternative to for example democracy and public elections. 

When I had organized a festival, years ago, and it had to be cancelled, a new age friend asked me: ”Why did you create this situation, why did you want the festival to be cancelled?”. To me that question was to slap me in the face. I have responsibility for my own life, but I am not God, I don’t have the capacity to rule the world, or to make people do things. This festival was partly cancelled due to other persons fears, and what was said in media at the time. It’s a weird idea that I could control other persons actions and thoughts.

As I see it, all that lives on this planet is interdependent on each other. In that meaning one might talk about oneness. And if people don’t believe in that thought, that is part of the game. Why throw people out who seems to disagree? Why not listen more to each other? Be interested? What would happen if we were more compassionate, not searching for faults in each other? What if we crawl out of the sandbox and listen, using me-messages: ”I feel…” instead of you-message ”You are wrong”. 

In my eyes, and in my social medias, the level of anger, conflict, and harsh words have increased rapidly since spring 2020. And I still see this anger, and I also see people being really mean to each other, for having different views about what is going on in the world. And it saddens me. 

How can we transform this anger to love and compassion? 

Like the late Wayne Dyer said: ”When you have the choice between being right and being kind, just choose kind.” I agree.

Charlotte Cronquist is a love warrior
Love is the answer